The recurring dream

I'm convinced that I'm crazy. I have had this recurring dream about the wedding for the last 4 months. It always starts out that I wake up on my wedding day and nothing is ready and nothing is done. I have no invitations sent. I have no dress. We don't even have anything to serve for dinner at the reception. So I scurry around all day and try to put everything together last minute and it always fails. There is no wedding. Then Aaron's leave runs out (on that day for some reason) and he leaves for Singapore...without me.

It's a horrible way to wake up and start your day.

Well, now the dream is taking other forms of "horrifying" as I am getting things done. Last night I dreamt that in order to calm my nerves on the big day, I "over medicate" myself and wake up not remembering anything from the whole wedding day. Which apparently didn't go so well. In the dream, my family is pretty pissed at me and stages an intervention and forces me into rehab rather than trotting off to Singapore. Isn't that pleasant and inappropriate?

What the heck is wrong with me? Why can't I have happy dreams about this day?

Don't get me wrong, I'm crazy excited for the wedding. It's going to be the best day ever and I promise to not be crazy about every detail being perfect. It's just so dang stressful to plan these things. No one tells you about this part of planning a wedding. I totally understand why people hire wedding planners now.

I just can't wait till we're married and everything can fall into a new state of normal and I'm not a crazy girl anymore. :)