Tuesday, August 11, 2009

That's Not Milk

There are two things a girl from Kansas knows better than most things: quality beef and delicious, fresh milk.

It's farm country afterall. Most of this stuff is in our back yard...or just down the road a lil' ways.

We know fresh.

We know cows.

The other day, Singapore tried to pull a fast one on this Kansas girl.

It tricked her into thinking she was buying milk.

It looks like milk, right? Don't let it fool you too. It was a horrible, awful lie. A lie that I didn't realize until it was all over my Honey Nut Cheerios.

A sad, sad day.

It was as if I'd just poured coffee creamer into my innocent cereal. My milk-loving heart broke into a million pieces with the first bite.

Then I flipped the carton around to see just what on Earth I'd put into my body.

Do you see that?! Milk solids?! The main ingredient is milk solids!

That just ain't right. (See, I was so upset, it brought out the "Kansas" in me.)

Not only that, but they've added flavoring. Since when does plain milk need flavoring? I thought it did just fine on its own.

Oh no no. It made me so sad.

I should have known better. It's made in Singapore. I don't see many cows 'round these parts.

I miss you, you beautiful Kansas cows. Come visit soon...and bring me some milk.

6 comments:

Brad Farless said...

Keep an eye out for Cowshead milk. It's the shelf stable kind, that you don't refrigerate until after you open it, but it's palatable at least.

My favorite milk related story is when I saw a carton of milk that said: "Milk: Made With Fresh Milk!" Go figure! Who knew milk was made with milk!? I actually have a pic of it and it's queued up as a humor/Engrish post on my blog for sometime during the next month or so.

Oh, and my condolences on the Cheerios. They're not cheap here...

TC said...
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Brad Farless said...

I had one of those a loooong time ago when I first got to Singapore. I saw it on the shelf at the Giants out by the Ikea in Tampines. I figured, why not? I like bananas. I was pleasantly surprised.

Cori said...

Do you know that one of my patients gets Meals on Wheels, and they give them something similar? I was like, "Why does your milk have an expiration date 6 months away?" Ohhhhh.... My tax dollars at work. (Shiver)
I wish I could send you some milk, Sis. We even have two kinds: 2% and Baby Coop's whole milk. :) These kids go through 3 to 4 gallons a week.

Dawn said...

I have to point out though, that you Americans unleashed 'low fat' milk on the world. Milk with zero percent fat? When I poured myself a cup for the first time, I wondered why the milk tasted chalky (and here I was thinking low fat meant SOME fat at least).

I know, I know, you're going to say people in Kansas can't be blamed for milk you get in other states :)

Megan said...

Dawn, I will agree with you there. I wish low/non fat milk could be taken back as if it never existed.

You are right though, it sure didn't come from Kansas! I blame California and all their weird health habits. :)